5 Action Steps to Radiant Self Love

We need to love ourselves more.

Yesterday I was on my way to the gym, when I hopped on the elevator. I had no desire to workout but after one look at my thighs in the mirror I had convinced myself to go. I pressed level one and looked down upon myself. I instantly started mentally degrading my legs. Did no one else notice that they were the size of tree trunks? As I mentally prepared myself to do extra sets of squats, a friendly middle aged woman boarded the elevator. Completely wrapped up in my own negative self-talk, I didn’t even bother to say hello.  As the elevator descended felt her eyes on me, I looked up and noticed her smiling. She sighed heavily and said, “you are so skinny.” Me? Was she taking to me? I looked around my shoulder but nope, I was definitely the only person on the elevator.  I began to blush and smiled.

                “Thank you” I said quickly, unsure of how else to return the compliment I didn’t feel I deserved.

                “My doctor said I’m getting fatter.” I looked up at her quickly ad my heart ached. I stood in silence. How was I supposed to respond to that?  I looked her up and down and didn’t see her wight but a beautiful woman. I noticed she had smile lines all around her mouth, that I can only assume were from years of laughter. It made her charming and warm. I stood there unanswering, just thinking about the amount of insecurity in one elevator. Finally  the elevator hit the ground floor. The kind lady smiled weakly and left.

How I wish I could rewind that moment, I desperately want to run after her and wrap her in a warm embrace. I want to shake her and tell her she is radiant! But what about me? If I could so clearly see her beauty, why did I struggle so much to see my own? Shouldn’t I be saying “we are both radiant!”

That’s the problem, we as women are so unforgiving to ourselves. We refuse to see ourselves as anything less than flawed. The lady on the elevator and I were both convinced we were “fat.”  She spoke her insecurities out loud, but was that any different than the internal self-hate I had just been hammering into myself?  I don’t know about you but I’m tired of letting my insecurities steal my joy! What about you? Believe me, I understand how hard it can be in a world where every ad is trying to sell perfection. Getting wrinkles? Find perfectly smooth skin with a miracle cream. Have rolls on your stomach? Achieve perfect six pack abs with one drink of the new detox tea (eyeroll).  Single and lonely? Find a warm body with the swipe of a hand.  The world doesn’t want us to be content with who we are, but I say we rebel.

 Let’s start a radiant rebellion of self love.

Ladies, we need to start loving ourselves now. TODAY.  Flaws and all. I so often think that if only I could lose 10 lbs that finally then I would suddenly “love” the way I look. However, that isn’t the way it works. Have you ever felt that way?  As if you wouldn’t be happy with yourself until you reached perfection?  Why are we so afraid of the flaws? Sisters, we need to stop waiting for tomorrow and love ourselves today. We can’t afford to wait for the possibility of perfection tomorrow and rob the world of the beauty we have today

Aim for purpose not perfection.  The is no fulfillment in perfection, but there is contentment in progress.

Make your daily purpose to love God, love others, and love yourself. Christ reminds us that he thinks we are beautiful and wonderfully made.

Jesus loves us as the beautifully messy works in progress we are.

So, why can’t we love ourselves as works in progress? It doesn’t matter how much you weigh, how successful you are, how popular you are, or how much you accomplish. You are loved today. Here and now. Just as you are.

The world isn’t the same without your brand of unique beauty and spirit.

 Let it shine, let it radiate.

We don’t need to be perfect to be lovely. Wellness stems from learning to care for you whole self.

Are you ready for purpose not perfection? I challenge you to start with these 5 steps to loving yourself better today. Make your purpose to love yourself like God loves you. Take time to celebrate your strengths and recognize areas of growth.

5 Action Steps to Radiant Self Love

1.Stop Comparing

Our idea of perfection is often times driven based upon what we see in the media and world around us. Stop measuring your worth from hopeless comparison. Instead acknowledge the beauty you see in women around you. Find what makes other’s unique and compliment them! Recognize that their beauty is theirs, and yours is yours!

Self Love Action Step:  

Find 3 women to compliment today. Recognize their unique traits as 100% their own. Then give yourself 3 compliments ( yep speak them out loud) about characteristics that are 100% yours.

2. Recognize your strengths

The best way to love yourself better is to celebrate those strong attributes that make you unique. God equipped you with talents, features, beauty marks, and a powerful personality to stand out in this world.

Self Love Action Step: 

Set a timer for 1 minute. Without thinking write down as many strengths you have in that 1-minute time frame. Don’t overthink it, just write as many things you love about yourself as you can! You’d be amazed how many you have.

3. Celebrate your Strengths

Once you have a list of your strengths it’s time to begin embracing them! We so often focus on our flaws that we forget to highlight our strengths. I know I spend far too much time covering up imperfection (hello contouring and flowy shirts) and far too little time highlighting my lovely assets. Take time to celebrate those strengths you have and worry less about making up for those inevitable weaknesses

 Self Love Action Step:

 Let’s use social media for good eh? Find a photo of yourself and post it with a caption that highlights and celebrates a strength you have. It could be a physical feature, it could be a personality trait, it could be a skill. It doesn’t matter. Remember it’s not prideful but purposeful to love yourself and celebrate who God made you to be once and a while.

4.Verbally affirm yourself

Yep I’m going to make you talk out loud. I’m a firm believer that when you speak something into existence it becomes real. So let’s speak some self-love into existence ladies!

Self Love Action Step: 

Take your list of strengths and post them somewhere you can see it often. ( I personally like to put it one the wall across from my toilet… im in there a lot… don’t judge). Take 5 minutes a day to actually, out loud, speak your strengths. Speak it to Embrace it.

5.Live in your present beauty

 Stop trying to fix everything. Part of living well and loving yourself is learning to live joyfully and presently DESPITE the areas in your life that need work. I’m not saying you shouldn’t strive to better yourself ( in fact I encourage it!) but don’t forget to celebrate yourself for just who you are, here and now!  Let go of any unrealistic goals and instead focus on what you’ve already accomplished.

Self Love Action Step: 

Make a list of goals you HAVE achieved in your life. Take a moment to celebrate those accomplishments. Realize that just who you are RIGHT now is more than enough.



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<3 Stay Radiant